Blurred Moment
by txilar
Summary: Taken from a longer unpublished fic, this is just romantic confessions of love fluff.


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Seventh year passed in a nearly blissful blur for The Marauders. They each one passed their NEWTS with brilliant marks; some a little more brilliant than others, but each with marks high enough to guarantee respectable jobs. Lily had long since given into James and started dating him exclusively, but it was that last year they were so happily together that it became hard to remember how much she'd hated him in the years previous. Her denial that she ever hated him made it harder still to recall, even to laugh at. Peter could prove it with an old picture no one ever knew he took. In it Lily sneered at James after he says something. She steps forward, slaps him and stomps off, leaving James looking bewildered. In the picture, Peter's hand points at James and then waves at the camera. Lily said she was framed. They made a charming couple and even teachers were hard pressed not to congratulate them on occasion. It was inevitable they would marry and when they finally did, it was a huge affair, James's Wizarding connexions surpassing even Lily's expectations. No one even commented about the fact that she wore an ivory gown. She told her mum it was because it looked better with her colouring. Remus agreed, even though he knew her real reason, telling her it was a fact that redheads simply didn't look right in white. The ivory silk made her shimmer.

Remus wore a borrowed suit from James that fit and wasn't so far out of date to make him feel out of place. Sirius, on purpose, wore an older suit of his own, after asking Lily's mum to let the hems out since he'd grown. Near the end of the reception when few people were left, the two of them danced. Sirius had joked he would have to get Remus pissed to get him on the dance floor and "Would you look?" that's just what he did. Remus denied it until he saw the moving pictures that Peter took. "Sneaky Peter!" he said, laughing and watching Sirius laugh in the picture. "I dance rather well for a drunken Englishman."

"You dance better than Pete, that's why he was taking the pictures eh!" laughed Jory, poking at Peter, who shrugged his shoulders at her, grinning. Jory and Peter made up for what they lacked in charm, by being devotedly cute. Where there was one, the other wasn't far behind and wherever the two were together, they were laughing and sitting shoulder to shoulder, waiting for a kiss and giggling when it was done. James kept asking Peter when he was going to make her an honest woman and Peter blushed, saying "Soon, yeah, soon."

Then there was Remus and Sirius. Severus made good on his promise and told everyone he could about the two of them. For a long time no one believed him, but Sirius's increasingly frequent touches made it harder not to. Nevertheless, Remus smiled and it was sunshine and for a long time no one cared. Then, Regulus picked the wrong day and the wrong thing to say and Remus got into the first and only fight he ever started and finished. Regulus was actually pushed to tears, though not in so many words. Madame Pince expressed disbelief that Remus was even involved. He lost 50 house points (broken bones will get you that) and had an entire month of detention (they were so shocked they made an example of him.) Through it all, Remus smiled contentedly and said it was worth it, even when he was forced to shake hands with Regulus. Even when Regulus leaned forward and whispered, "I'll ruin it. I will." And he never told anyone about that, not even Sirius, who is still jealous of Phaidon. And Remus knows because they saw him out one day early in the summer after seventh year and had drinks and Remus's eyes followed him when he left and Sirius asked and Remus couldn't answer. _It's still new,_ he thinks, _and I'm scared and what if Sirius thinks it's supposed to stay in the past too?_ And that night, after Sirius kissed him and it was a little desperate, Remus wondered why until Sirius said 'Well, you're mine because I won.' And Remus smiled despite himself.

Jory never mentions Phaidon to Remus. He's certain she knows about her brother. It's obvious she knows about Remus and Sirius when they live together and kiss in front of their friends. Remus imagines she has her suspicions, but she never says anything. Only once at a summer dinner she tells the group that she was going to see her brother married off late that autumn and that she had started wondering if he would ever get married at all. Remus doesn't ask what she means and neither does Sirius. James gives them a funny look and Lily bites his ear while looking at Remus. A month before said wedding, an owl dropped Remus a post including some Belgian chocolate, a letter, and a wedding invitation inviting him and a guest. Remus wasn't sure he should go, wasn't sure he should take Sirius, but, with his mother's voice in his ear, he knew it wouldn't do to not go. It would be neither polite nor right. And the letter, simple if you didn't read between the lines, made him go, made him need to go. They ate the chocolate together that night in bed and he told Sirius and drug Sirius with him. If nothing else, dressing up was fun and getting out of the flat for something grown up was fun, too, in its way. The suit he wore was a shiny brown colour and Sirius kept telling him the colour made him glow and the tie, the ugly red tie, was like a rip cord and he'd pull it when they were alone.

They went to the wedding and Phaidon's wife was lovely, a very pretty French trained witch, nearly royal in her movements and overjoyed to meet Phaidon's good friends Remus and Sirius, who she was certain she could match up with cousins, sisters or friends. Phaidon smiled and his eyes lingered too long on Remus's lips and his hug was a little close and a little tight. He shook Sirius's hand, but it was stiff and Remus knew Sirius was thinking, "Mine, I won," the whole time.

Sirius looked like something out of a magazine in his fancy black robes, black suit, black tie and black hair. Remus stepped outside to smoke while Sirius danced. Phaidon was beside him in an instant. "I never wanted this, Remus. I mean, what I am saying is that I did want this, I didn't know I didn't. I wanted you." Remus smiled and shook his head.

"No Phaidon, you did want this. You just didn't know. The rest is immaterial." Phaidon shook his head and tried to lean into Remus, but this time it was Remus who pulled back and Phaidon who frowned. Still, it was Sirius who interrupted, with a frown of his own. Remus put his cigarette out and touched Phaidon's face saying "Congratulations. She's lovely, Phaidon. I wish you the best. And you'll have beautiful children, won't you?" Then Remus heads toward the door, Sirius looking at Phaidon. "Thanks," says Sirius, his hand out to Phaidon. Phaidon shakes his head and Sirius's hand and smiles and they both know why he's thanking him.

They apparate close to home, but Remus wants to walk so they walk. For a long time, neither one speaks until Sirius can't take it anymore and he does speak. "You didn't—"

"Sirius."

"I'm not jealous. Not really. I just can't help but remember that year." Remus nods, arm winding around Sirius's. "Did you love him?" They are walking up the steps now, and Sirius's hand is on his hip. At the door, invisible magic testing them, tasting them and allowing them through, his lips are on Remus's neck.

Remus opens the door and Sirius follows. "No. I liked him" he says, walking through the kitchen taking off his tie. Sirius follows him to the bedroom. "I liked him like you like me." Remus sits on the edge of the bed in his suit watching as Sirius changes.

Sirius throws his robe on the bed and peels the skin of the suit off of him and drapes it messily but elegantly on the floor and pulls on his worn jeans and a stylish shirt with odd zippers and patches of material. Remus slowly takes off his suit, a gift from his father for this occasion, and hangs it properly in the wardrobe. He too pulls on jeans, but settles for a t-shirt with long sleeves and ironic quotes.

Remus smiles when Sirius says "I more than like you, Remus."

He replies, "Of course you do. You must." He turns to face Sirius and kisses him and kisses him and stops and turns before he can respond. Remus goes back into the kitchen and makes himself a cup of tea. He walks out the door onto the balcony and leans against the railing, sipping tea and waiting to finish so he can smoke. He watches the sky, grey and impenetrable as Sirius's eyes. He glimpses the edge of sunset, and watches leaves drift by, dry and brown. He steps back into the flat and Sirius is on the sofa, reading. Remus smiles as he looks down at Sirius and Sirius smiles as he up looks at Remus.

"I more than _love_ you, Remus."

Remus joins him on the sofa, stretching across it and leaning his head into Sirius's lap. He rolls on his side and loops his arms around Sirius, pushing himself up with his feet against the side of the sofa. Sirius, as always, twirls Remus's honeyed hair around his fingers. Remus, as always, smiles.

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**Standard Disclaimer:** These are not my characters. All rights belong to JK Rowling. I use them solely for the purpose of fandom and intend nothing more than that.


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